To my Zayne,
As our time to meet grows near, I'm finding it harder and harder to sleep. My mind is filled with excitement, as I have waited so long for your arrival, and I cannot wait to see your precious face. I wonder who you'll look like, if you'll have your dad's eyes and my nose. I wonder what your first thoughts will be, if it will be "Hey mom and dad!" or "Who are these crazy people?" I'm also a little nervous. I've never been a mom before. I'm sure there will be some bumps in the road, and I pray that you have patience with me as I learn. We will both make our share of mistakes, but I know that we will be just fine.
I'm sure that by now you have noticed all the keepsakes I've collected for you, and I hope you don't think I'm a hoarder. Your dad and I prayed for you for so long, so when we found out that I was pregnant with you, I decided to start writing down our experiences. You have been our miracle since before you were conceived. I made a scrapbook filled with memories from before you even existed. Your creation was such a big event, and you had many followers long before your birth. I am thankful to have such a large support system to guide me thru this! I started journaling my pregnancy early on, the ups and downs, my feelings as you were growing inside me. I kept all the cards received so you will see just how many people love you. I kept all the notes from the birthing classes. Some (or all) of this may seem silly, but I want you to know that prayers do come true, and you are proof of that, and I want to remember each step of this journey and share it with you.
My hope is that you will know just how much you were loved, before you even set foot on this earth. There aren't enough words in the dictionary to describe my feelings for you. Each night as I watch you squirm inside my tummy, I am fascinated my your activity level. You are always on the move, which makes me wonder if you're going to be an all-star athlete when you grow up, or if you're just cramped in your current living quarters. I could sit back and watch you move all day long. I'm sure you will have an amazing personality, always busy, just like your father. And I'm sure that I'm gonna be one tired momma when you start crawling and walking!
So I guess to sum it all up, I just cannot wait for you to get here. I'm not worried about labor or pain, or anything in between, because it's all so worth it to have you in our lives. I am already so proud of you, for being a fighter and making it through the science experiment that was your conception. I can't wait to see what the future holds for you! I never dreamt that this time would come, and I'm thrilled to call you my son. I love you more than you will ever know!
Love always,
Mom
Saturday, September 28, 2013
Saturday, September 14, 2013
Getting closer!!!!!!
I can't believe that our little miracle is due next month! NEXT MONTH!!!!! I have honestly enjoyed being pregnant, but I can't wait to meet this little guy who has been breakdancing in my tummy for the last few months. Maybe I'm just easily amused, but I could sit back and watch him move and kick all day long. And I'm convinced that he is either gonna be a boxer or a football player, as those arms and legs are always moving! He's got some strength behind them too! Brian got to feel Zayne move for the first time this month. He's felt the kicking before, but he actually felt Zayne turning and rolling, and his reaction was priceless. He is gonna be the best dad!
I started having Braxton Hicks contractions in this last month. I really expected them to hurt, but it's more like a strong pressure in my tummy when my uterus contracts. Brian's new "thing" is to poke my tummy whenever he's near, and inform me if I'm having a contraction or not. I think it's funny, because most times, I don't even notice them. Really the only way I can tell is by the hardening of my tummy. It feels like I've swallowed a watermelon. On another note, Brian bought a watermelon a couple weeks ago, and I proceeded to put it under my shirt... He thought that was pretty funny. ;) I have had one painful contraction. I just had just woke up from an awful dream, and my abdomen hurt like crazy. I was all balled up and couldn't stretch out or breathe. Thankfully it only lasted about 20 seconds, and has never returned. I don't know if it was an actual contraction or just stress from the dream, but whatever it was, it sucked!
Zayne and I have had a couple check ups lately, although they were nothing exciting. Just a quick check of his heart rate and the typical Q&A session. We have an appointment next week, and doc plans to do an ultrasound (FINALLY! I've only been begging for the last 6 weeks!), so hopefully we can get a better estimate on Zayne's size. I guess I've got a bunch of vaccinations coming up in the next few weeks, but the only one I remember is the Pertussis vaccine. There was a big story on the news a couple weeks back about how whooping cough is on the rise, so that was at the top of my list of questions to ask Dr. Spencer at our last visit. Brian got his vaccine the same day as that appointment, and I'm hoping that our parents will get vaccinated too before they come visit.
We started our Prepared Childbirth class two weeks ago. So far it's been pretty informative. There are about 8 other couples in the class with us, with two of them having twins. That could have been us! Since our first class, I have looked at Zayne's very first picture (the one with the two embryos that were implanted), and I wonder which one he is. I really hope he finds this whole journey as exciting as we have, when he grows up and looks through all his baby stuff. I don't know of any baby that has been so anticipated and has had so many followers since well before he was born! Anyway, back to these classes... Brian has been attending the birthing classes with me, and I think he is learning a lot. He's very proactive in the process, and doesn't hesitate to ask questions. I love that. He wasn't able to make it to the Breastfeeding class, but I brought home a bag of info that I'm hoping he will flip thru eventually. He had to work, but I secretly think that his reasoning was, "I don't have boobs, so what can I do?" True statement, but I think he will be a little more involved than he thinks. The whole thing sounds like an interesting process, and I'm sure I will need all the support I can get. The realization finally hit me during the breastfeeding class, that Zayne will be here before we know it. I actually became a little emotional during the class, even though no one noticed, simply because all of this has been such a whirlwind of an adventure. For years, I never thought I would have the experience of becoming a mom; no baby showers, no classes, no worry/fear/excitement of raising a child, and all of a sudden, it's happening. I think I literally felt every emotion possible in a matter of minutes.
Football season has started, so that means Saturdays are full of excitement, at least for a few hours each week. None of my Husker gear fits at the moment, so my shirt of choice is Brian's Husker jersey. I feel like I'm the size of a barn when I wear it, but I gotta support my team! I'm kinda tossing around the idea of putting Zayne in a husker outfit once he arrives. Wonder how much commotion he would cause, being born in Texas but wearing Husker gear!
I started having Braxton Hicks contractions in this last month. I really expected them to hurt, but it's more like a strong pressure in my tummy when my uterus contracts. Brian's new "thing" is to poke my tummy whenever he's near, and inform me if I'm having a contraction or not. I think it's funny, because most times, I don't even notice them. Really the only way I can tell is by the hardening of my tummy. It feels like I've swallowed a watermelon. On another note, Brian bought a watermelon a couple weeks ago, and I proceeded to put it under my shirt... He thought that was pretty funny. ;) I have had one painful contraction. I just had just woke up from an awful dream, and my abdomen hurt like crazy. I was all balled up and couldn't stretch out or breathe. Thankfully it only lasted about 20 seconds, and has never returned. I don't know if it was an actual contraction or just stress from the dream, but whatever it was, it sucked!
Zayne and I have had a couple check ups lately, although they were nothing exciting. Just a quick check of his heart rate and the typical Q&A session. We have an appointment next week, and doc plans to do an ultrasound (FINALLY! I've only been begging for the last 6 weeks!), so hopefully we can get a better estimate on Zayne's size. I guess I've got a bunch of vaccinations coming up in the next few weeks, but the only one I remember is the Pertussis vaccine. There was a big story on the news a couple weeks back about how whooping cough is on the rise, so that was at the top of my list of questions to ask Dr. Spencer at our last visit. Brian got his vaccine the same day as that appointment, and I'm hoping that our parents will get vaccinated too before they come visit.
We started our Prepared Childbirth class two weeks ago. So far it's been pretty informative. There are about 8 other couples in the class with us, with two of them having twins. That could have been us! Since our first class, I have looked at Zayne's very first picture (the one with the two embryos that were implanted), and I wonder which one he is. I really hope he finds this whole journey as exciting as we have, when he grows up and looks through all his baby stuff. I don't know of any baby that has been so anticipated and has had so many followers since well before he was born! Anyway, back to these classes... Brian has been attending the birthing classes with me, and I think he is learning a lot. He's very proactive in the process, and doesn't hesitate to ask questions. I love that. He wasn't able to make it to the Breastfeeding class, but I brought home a bag of info that I'm hoping he will flip thru eventually. He had to work, but I secretly think that his reasoning was, "I don't have boobs, so what can I do?" True statement, but I think he will be a little more involved than he thinks. The whole thing sounds like an interesting process, and I'm sure I will need all the support I can get. The realization finally hit me during the breastfeeding class, that Zayne will be here before we know it. I actually became a little emotional during the class, even though no one noticed, simply because all of this has been such a whirlwind of an adventure. For years, I never thought I would have the experience of becoming a mom; no baby showers, no classes, no worry/fear/excitement of raising a child, and all of a sudden, it's happening. I think I literally felt every emotion possible in a matter of minutes.
Football season has started, so that means Saturdays are full of excitement, at least for a few hours each week. None of my Husker gear fits at the moment, so my shirt of choice is Brian's Husker jersey. I feel like I'm the size of a barn when I wear it, but I gotta support my team! I'm kinda tossing around the idea of putting Zayne in a husker outfit once he arrives. Wonder how much commotion he would cause, being born in Texas but wearing Husker gear!
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