Total Opposites

I've never had trouble writing. The words always just seem to come to me. Yet I sit staring that the computer screen with this post that I started writing nearly 2 months ago. I keep rewriting and revising, but it just never seems to convey what I'm trying to express. This is a completely new issue for me! At last post, I was just in the process of completing our embryo transfer, and was starting the dreaded two week wait. At this point in time, I'm nearing completion of my first trimester, and boy is this pregnancy different from my pregnancy with Zayne. I knew that this transfer would be successful, as I was sick since day 1. Whoever coined the term "morning sickness" must have been out of their mind. In my world, morning sickness means "from one morning to the next." Just this week, doc has finally found the right combination of meds to make my days more bearable. I'm still not 100%, but at least I feel human again! I had lost a total of 13 pounds since getting pregnant. Between being sick and not being able to eat, the weight just fell off. This is the time when I'm thankful that I'm a bigger girl and have all those extra pounds stored away, so I can afford to lose a couple here and there. This pregnancy has definitely been filled with drama, leading me to believe that this baby is a girl. Aside from the sickness, I have also been put on bed rest already. At about 6 weeks in, I started bleeding heavily. Thankfully, it was just a small hemorrhage, and baby wasn't affected, but it was sure scary. I don't think I've ever been so terrified in my life. Everything is fine now, but I'm still on edge. Every cramp, every spot of blood, anything out of the norm nearly sends me into a panic. I'm praying that things calm down once I hit my second trimester. When I was pregnant with Zayne, I enjoyed every minute of my pregnancy. No drama, no stress. This pregnancy is completely opposite. I try to take all the stressful moments as indicators that baby is still there, instead of dwelling on how awful I feel. It's hard tho, because it's such an overwhelming feeling. I have found myself surfing Pinterest, trying to find ideas for the nursery. With Zayne, I knew immediately what I wanted to do with his room. I have found quite a few ideas that I like, but nothing that jumps out and says, "This is the one." It seems like most of the things I find are either jungle themed or nautical themed. I don't want either of those. I don't want it to be too girly (still assuming that baby is a girl), but yet I want to find something cutesy. Maybe once we go look at furniture, I will be inspired. Here's hoping. We also have started making some of the bigger purchases that need to be completed pre-baby. First up was a new HVAC system for the house. The babies rooms were the coldest rooms in the house, so there was no question that something had to be done. Our next big project is a different vehicle. My car works well for one child, but the back seat won't fit two rear-facing carseats. I'm hoping for an SUV with a foldable third row seat, so it will accomodate the entire family. We want to be able to take the dogs on road trips, pick up friends and family from the airport when they come to visit, and have plenty of room for carting around all my work equipment. Hopefully if we start the search now, we might actually find something before little Snowflake arrives. Ahh, adulthood! :/ 3 months down, only 6 to go!